Improv Comedy Saved Me and My Dating Life
Improv Comedy Saved Me and My Dating Life
The healing power of comedy and laughter helped me escape anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues I battled after ending a toxic relationship
When I was in my mid-twenties, I had just gotten out of a long-term toxic relationship I knew I needed to find friends and rebuild my life as a single woman. Unfortunately, many of my friends chose my ex in the break up signaling that he was the better half of the relationship, this cut extra deep. So, as I was trying to heal from my break up, recover from the toxic relationship, and then accept the loss of my friends, I found myself isolated on an island without a social community to turn to for support. I wasn't sure how to rebuild my life but I knew that I needed to start with making new friends. This was daunting as I was so insecure about so many parts of my life at that time, and my friends choosing my ex made me further believe I was worthless. In all of my insecurity and my damaged psyche from my toxic relationship, I decided to sign up for an improv comedy class at The Second City.
In all of my insecurity and my damaged psyche from my toxic relationship, I decided to sign up for an improv comedy class at The Second City.
I was living in Chicago at the time, and thought “how can I live this close to such an amazing comedy training program and not take advantage of it?!” This was wildly outside my comfort zone, I was such a closed-off, and a wrapped-up bundle of pain that I couldn't even look people in the eye. My insecurity was through the roof and I struggled with anxiety just to show up to the class. Sitting in a room full of strangers was intimidating enough but as soon as we began the class we had to get up and do exercises in front of these strangers I could feel myself wanting to die at that moment.
Sitting in a room full of strangers was intimidating enough but as soon as we began the class we had to get up and do exercises in front of these strangers I could feel myself wanting to die at that moment.
It was some of the most intimidating challenges I've ever done in my life, especially as I was in the midst of receiving all the rejection in every other aspect of my life. I didn't know how to be funny, and I knew even less about how to connect and trust people after the betrayal from my ex and my friends. Everything about this class terrified me but I knew I needed to follow through with my commitment.
My first class was in February of 2017 and I only planned on doing the one 8-week course because I wanted to try something new and push myself outside of my comfort zone by learning a new skill. Also, I wanted to shock everyone who rejected me because they thought I wasn't the better half to stay in touch with after the break up (who wins the breakup can be such a motivating factor of change). I quickly fell in love with each member of my class and at the end of the 8-week course, we all agreed to continue to the next level together. This is the ideal situation for building trust and rapport in a comedy troupe and it's difficult to have major changes in a group, the trust bond runs so deep and that's where the comedy arises. We were a unique troupe, all of the teachers in the program had heard about us, as all 12 of our troupe members stayed together throughout the entire year-long program and we even hired a coach afterward to continue our education. We were The Second City fan favorites as we all fully committed to showing up for each other and fully committed to growing our comedy and performance skills through trust and forming deeply loving and supportive connections with each other.
This improv comedy class that I originally signed up for just to say I did it turned into one of my favorite life's experiences as it taught me so many social skills that I had lost in my relationship and furthermore I built a whole new world with strangers that knew me on an intimate level and supported me through the growth that program provided. Comedy heals and laughter is medicine, we all agreed that we fell in love with the high we got after each class because we spent 3 hours together laughing and making each other laugh every week.
Comedy heals and laughter is medicine, we all agreed that we fell in love with the high we got after each class because we spent 3 hours together laughing and making each other laugh every week.
Tequila Hammock with our favorite coach, Mark.
Our performances were especially fun as we sold out every show and our largest audience was over 150 people. This program was something that I showed up to in a very damaged mental state and the commitment we made to each other healed each of us in a way I relate to group therapy.
This improv comedy program was something that I showed up to in a very damaged mental state and the commitment we made to each other healed each of us in a way I relate to group therapy.
To this day, I am very close friends with all of my troupe mates, our troupe is called Tequila Hammock, and we all stay in touch and support each other because we know how healing our time together was.
On top of that, learning improv skills like active listening and how to stay composed in a stressful situation (performing in front of an audience of 150 people without knowing what you're going to do) has been one of the most valuable gifts I could have given myself in life. Those skills translate to real-life situations more than some formal education in the traditional schooling system. I highly recommend signing up for comedy classes as they are deeply healing in ways you didn't know you needed and also comedy is fun, people like funny people, it makes you more magnetic and will add dramatic value to your social skills and social interactions.
Have you experienced something like this? Did you do improv comedy? How did you heal from a difficult breakup? We want to know about your experience. Leave a comment below and let us know. We love hearing from you so don’t forget to share your feedback!
- the AND, SWIPE RIGHT team
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