Ep 25: Sugar Babies & Scammers
Dating Hotline, a podcast presented by AND, SWIPE RIGHT
Dating Hotline
Ep. 25
Sugar Babies & Scammers
SHOW NOTES
- DATING HOTLINE -
Ep 25: Sugar Babies & Scammers
Host: Chloé Miller
Production: AND, SWIPE RIGHT INC.
Show Music: Andrew Langdon
Transition Music: Nikolas Thorpe
“Online romance scammers will try multiple strategies to build trust with you upfront and then swindle you out of your money later on. They will use techniques like talking about how they themself have been scammed out of money and that they are looking for good people who won’t do that to them…"
-Chloé Miller
Founder, & CEO of AND, SWIPE RIGHT
EPISODE DESCRIPTION
In the twenty-fifth episode of Dating Hotline presented by AND, SWIPE RIGHT - Chloé discusses the kept life, sugar babies and kept men, Sugar Daddies & Sugar Mamas. It sounds like a dream but is that really the case? Chloé provides guidance for how men can ward off sugar baby wannabes if they are not looking for that type of partnership and then she shares a personal story about an investigative effort into the sugar baby world. Plus, she answers two popular dating questions:
1. All the women I’m matching with immediately want to talk off the app and then present their financial problems to me followed be asking me for money. What do I do if I'm not looking to be a sugar daddy?
2. Walk me through your online sugar baby experience, what was that like?
- To submit a question or topic for discussion on a future episode -
LINKS
- Fool Me Twice (True-Crime) Podcast -
Online Romance Scams
- Forbes Article -
Online Romance Scams are Increasing during COVID
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TRANSCRIPT
Dating Hotline
Ep 24: Social Intelligence
EP 25 - Sugar Daddies & Sugar Babies & Scammers
Hi Dating Hotliners - Have you ever wanted to just throw in the towel with dating, quit your job and become a sugar baby - guys for you it would be considered a kept man? Um yes, I contemplate this regularly because when life gets hard that life sounds so easy and I question why I make my life more difficult by choosing to carve out my own path in the entrepreneurial life. It could be so much easier if I only had to worry about constantly looking pretty on someone’s arm and that was the extent of my responsibilities. Well, the grass is always green on the other side but in reality, is this life really all it’s cracked up to be? That’s what we’re going to discuss today. Ya ready? Let’s go.
SHOW MUSIC
What’s up you guys - it’s Chloé Miller your host and creator of Dating Hotline’s sponsor - AND, SWIPE RIGHT. Episodes 25 and every other episode of Dating Hotline is presented by AND, SWIPE RIGHT - an online dating & relationship consultancy. Through services like Dating & Relationship Coaching, private personal consulting appointments, Personal Styling services, creating engaging dating profiles, and the newest service, a monthly texting membership AND SWIPE RIGHT provides support throughout all stages of dating. AND, SWIPE RIGHT is setting a high-value standard in online dating by empowering single women and men with dating techniques.
Thank you for listening today and every week - Dating Hotline releases new episodes EVERY WEDNESDAY at 11 am Central Time. So go ahead and hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcast or Follow on Spotify that way you’ll automatically get our new episode every week. And you guys please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. Your reviews help other people find Dating Hotline and then they listen to our show. Thank you for the 5-star rating! After you’ve left your review - send me a screenshot. I want to make sure to thank you appropriately. We post all of this information on the AND, SWIPE RIGHT website - Our show notes host links to the business & products we feature and other gems like our newsletter - check it out andswiperight.com
Also, I want to remind you as we are now in the third week of June, I’m still running a 25% off promotion on my private consulting appointments this month only. I’ve already had a handful of people sign up and some new clients too. Which is so exciting, I love meeting new people but you guys know how much I genuinely love helping people. It’s literally in my DNA so sign up for that private consultation and let’s get to work on improving those date skills and understanding how to navigate every dating situation like a pro! Book an appointment on the AND, SWIPE RIGHT website that’s andswiperight.com - you’ll see my prices reflecting this 25% discount. This is only good for June so really, if you don’t jump to put jeans on then you are absolutely going to miss this opportunity.
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The Sugar Baby/Kept Man life at times sounds like a dream! How hard can it be to solely focus on keeping yourself as arm candy - so you work out every day, eat healthy foods, and then dress well so that you catch the attention of others but solely give your attention to your sugar daddy or sugar mama. Um, I think we can ALL do that and honestly, how different is that from what we each do when we’re in a relationship. Not all that different. It sounds like such a simple life without the responsibility of work or other obligations to make ends meet - your sole purpose is to make the other person happy and in return, they will adorn you with gifts and a lifestyle that you might not be able to achieve by yourself. On paper - what could be better than this life? Well, you guys have heard me talk about life “on paper” and how on paper life isn’t always the reality of the situation. Sometimes it really is that simple and other times you find yourself in over your head with problems and issues you didn’t even know about.
The Kept lifestyle sounds desirable but only if you’re looking for that type of partnership and in most cases, if you’re a sugar baby you do not have a real relationship partner of your own. You are exclusively in a relationship with your sugar daddy. People with money and power don’t like to share their prized possessions so of course, you would be on your sugar daddy or sugar mommy’s list of exclusive mine.
For the sake of today’s episode please know that sugar baby and kept man will be used interchangeably, it’s just simpler to say one of the words rather than continually saying both. So please know that this episode is directed at both men & women because both genders can be kept, partners.
So for starters, yes you’re living the life of luxury and adorned with designer gifts, and just about anything you ask for can be yours….but what’s the dark side of this type of relationship? Well, I’ve already discussed the issue of financial abuse back in episode 21 and since that talked about two people making money and contributing to a joint lifestyle, this sugar baby/kept man relationship is far from a partnership. You are instead treated to the lifestyle and rewards of your sugar daddy or sugar mommy and thus, your privileges are limited. Now each sugar baby relationship is different but in many cases exclusivity is the utmost important factor of the relationship. If they will be dotting on you with expensive gifts and upgrade your lifestyle, they do not want you to see other people romantically. You are for their pleasure and their’s only. So when you engage in a sugar daddy situation you are closing yourself off to the possibility of creating a real, substantial relationship with someone else with whom you could actually build a future with. So this ultimately is a reason many people end their sometimes long-term relationships with their sugar daddy because they want more from their relationship. If you look closely some sugar babies stay for life with their sugar daddy but more sugar baby relationships deteriorate because the baby wants a real relationship of their own with partnership and equality, regardless of the life they’ve walked away. They found that the sugar baby/sugar daddy relationship to be insufficient for their life goals.
Because kept men & sugar babies relationships are predominately based on looks and appearance, having kids will never work. This would change the dynamic of the relationship and thus making the baby less physically attractive and ultimately having a real baby is something the daddy isn’t interested in because it goes against the grain of what a sugar daddy is seeking in his partnership - he’s not looking for a family, he’s looking for arm candy. Most relationships that plan for children deepen their love for their partner because of the gift - the baby - they now share together. Kids change people - emotionally and physically. If your love isn’t dynamic and running deep, to begin with, the changes that children bring could cause an impasse in your relationship. This is another reason why sugar baby relationships don’t work with kids - the love is one-dimensional - strictly based on physicality or should I say - appearance. In some cases, the sugar baby can sneak a relationship on the side because the sugar daddy relationship isn’t mentally or emotionally stimulating enough, and people get bored in those types of relationships. -- This is exactly the same reason people cheat in regular relationships. The relationship becomes stale and there’s not enough stimulation in other areas of the relationship - physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually. People are dynamic and if you’re not meeting those dynamic needs, they will be met by other people. It’s your decision to decide where the line is drawn with cheating - is an emotional relationship with someone else cheating? Or is cheating only when they physically cheat with someone….but I digress - let’s get back to sugar babies and leave the cheating conversation for another episode.
Usually, when you engage in a sugar daddy/baby relationship the rules of engagement or parameters of the relationship are established upfront. How often they will get together, what the weekly/monthly allowance will be, what’s necessary to earn the allowance...basically it’s the same as engaging in a business deal with someone where you clearly lay out the details of the relationship with a contract.
Side note - THIS is the only part of the sugar baby/daddy relationship that I actually respect. The clear communication of expectations from each participant. The rest of it is very one-sided however people engage with them because they clearly agree to the terms and see the reward as being higher than the potential loss. I should note that this type of business transaction isn’t up for negotiation, it’s a take it or leave it kind of deal - don’t expect to argue for additional points. Please learn from Sofia’s mistake - if you get the deal of a lifetime, TAKE IT. Don’t move the target and get slaughtered in the process.
But when it comes to kept men & sugar babies there are just as many drawbacks as there are pros to jumping into this type of relationship. For some people, there are no cons and all pros and for others, they couldn't imagine engaging in a relationship like this because it’s fundamentally based on an inauthentic reason - as in it’s not rooted in actual love, it’s rooted in the business transaction of mutual benefit. Our first Dating Hotline question is about this specific problem when relationships are not rooted in love - can they evolve into something with love?
But what happens if you are interested in engaging in this type of relationship and you want to find yourself a sugar daddy or you want to find a sugar baby. There are sites dedicated to these types of relationships but I’ll be the first person to tell you that you don’t need to be on these sites to find a sugar partnership. I’ve been approached on dating apps and even through Instagram many times to be a sugar baby and after turning many of them down because that’s so far from what I’m looking for in my partnership - out of pure curiosity and true investigative work for Dating Hotline, I decided to say yes to one guy who slid into my DMs. (Yo FBI when you’re looking for a new secret agent come find me) The second Dating Hotline question discusses my undercover agent work as an online sugar baby so that I could do some relationship dynamic research and then come back and tell you guys what it looks like and what are the red flags to look out for - IF you choose to ever engage in this type of relationship. Please note - sugar partnerships can appear to be innocent but SO MANY of them are scams. Don’t fall victim to a scam.
Before we dive into these questions, let’s discuss the typical sugar baby protocol
Typical sugar baby rules
Establish the boundaries of the partnership
Meet in person - again this is an arm candy situation so dress & present yourself at your best
Fulfill the terms of the agreement
Get paid out for the services /- quid pro quo / but in sugar relationships, it’s called an allowance
Repeat the process while engaging in a relationship that “keeps up appearances”
Typical sugar baby protocol rules for online sugar baby relationships
-Establish the boundaries of the partnership
- Talk online and keep the relationship going so that there's constant communication (remember if you cant meet in person you have to extend extra effort to keep it alive online)
- fulfill the terms of the agreement
-share payout information (address to be mailed gifts or bank info / Venmo account for cash payouts)
Keep that in mind as we discuss these next two questions. I get these requests ALL THE TIME in my DMs - including the latest sugar daddy seeking a sugar baby who slid in yesterday...I’ll post pictures on my show notes showing you guys his profile and what they say. Some are direct and pitch themself in the first DM and others start slower with a “hello” but usually when you have sugar daddies sliding into your DMs you know exactly what they are angling after...
Dating Hotline Question #1 - All the women I’m matching with immediately want to talk off the app and then present their financial problems to me followed be asking me for money. What do I do if I'm not looking to be a sugar daddy?
Oh man, this is super frustrating and I can only imagine how exhausting this cycle must be for men in this situation. First I would suggest looking at checking out some new dating apps - if you continue to run into the issue then the pool that you’re dating within (online) is filled with the wrong type of women based on what you’re seeking. Are you on Hinge? I love this app and while I’ve been approached on Hinge to be a sugar baby it still is my favorite of them all. Another one to check out is Happn, that connects you with people nearby so that there might be less sugar-daddy-seeking women and more women seeking love-based partnerships. And I believe Match has free services too depending on how serious you are about finding a partnership.
Next, I would suggest responding with something along the lines of “that’s too bad that you’re running into financial trouble. I’m looking for a partner and not just someone who wants a financial handout.” This will shutdown a lot of women who are only looking for that but it will also spare you your wasted time. If you clearly define what you’re looking for this early (even before the first date) then it’s like sifting through the bad and focusing your time and energy on the ones who are seeking the same interest. Dating online can be a mixed bag, because even if people say “they want a relationship”, it’s still a trust factor that they are being honest. Plus, everyone has different definitions of a “relationship”. This comment will tell the woman that you’re not going to play that game and more so that your intentions are to find true partnership. The women who are only seeking a sugar daddy will move on but the women who are seeking partnership will stick around.
I advise AGAINST saying something like ‘i have no problem paying for nice things for my partner but you need to earn that first” this is clever wording that I would usually suggest to my female clients engaging in high-value dating but I HIGHLY recommend against it for my male clients who are fending off sugar baby requests. When you say something like “I’m happy to pay for things for my partner or my girlfriend” you are creating a way around your firm boundary of “not seeking that type of partnership. In other words, by pointing that out to a woman who’s seeking a sugar daddy relationship, she will pursue you with hopes of obtaining that reward. Meaning, her intentions will be fixated on getting the financial goal vs purely creating a relationship with you based on love and mutual happiness. It’s assumed in a relationship that the money will flow between two people so avoiding the money conversation altogether and keeping the focus on what you’re seeking rather than answering her question directly keeps the upper hand with you and more so you can call the shots.
Yes, you will probably eliminate a lot of women but remember they were not high-quality women to benign with. They have different intentions than you do so in the long run this spares your time and energy. Plus, you’re also differentiating yourself from the men on the app who are seeking sugar baby relationships. Try pushing back on some of these women and if you run into the same conversations and or even ghosting afters then try a new dating app.
Guys, you’re smart not to engage with a sugar baby request if you’re not looking for that but also because romance scams are increasing especially during this quarantine. FORBES quotes “online romance scams are increasing as we are self-isolating during COVID.”
Don’t get involved with a sugar baby if you’re not looking for one, you’ll only set yourself up for disappointment and frustration down the road. Sugar babies don’t change their intentions; they are only ever looking out for themself - they’ll do whatever it takes to get what they want but it’s not based on love, it's based on their next financial goal. And thinking you can change a sugar baby into a long-lasting loving life partner is like a woman sleeping with a man and then expecting him to stop sleeping with other women and be monogamous with her. It’s just not going to happen, they aren’t going to change for you.
Dating Hotline Question #2 - Walk me through your online sugar baby experience, what was that like?
As I mentioned, I’m constantly getting sugar baby propositions in my DMS on dating apps but fortunately not in-person. I honestly don’t think I would respond well if some man approached me in-person asking to be his sugar baby. Usually, when I receive these messages I roll my eyes a couple of times, take a screenshot and then I don’t respond. But this one guy’s message or should I say proposition intrigued me. Why? Because I was bored in quarantine and I had just broken up with the guy I settled for in quarantine and I was like ok let’s see what this sugar baby life is like because if it goes well I’ll get something out of it and if it doesn’t I’ll but either way I’ll have something to share with my listeners on Dating Hotline. Yes, you guys, I think about you all the time, and you cross my mind when I make decisions. You hold me accountable to my own dating & relationship decisions. Including engaging in online sugar baby romances.
So this guy slid into my DMs with “Hi, my name is Richard and I’m from Texas. I think you’re really pretty and I’m looking for a new sugar baby.” I let him marinate for about 3 weeks before I actually responded because like I said, I rolled my eyes and then I don’t respond to sugar baby inquiries but on this day I was bored. Remember, I’ve never been a sugar baby so I didn’t know what to expect of what the process entailed so I flipped it on him to tell me the details. So I asked him, “Hi Richard what kind of sugar baby are you looking for?” He responded, “Someone who will talk to me, keep me company, and care for me. I want to create a real relationship with someone who is a good person” When I read this I was like hmm, ok I can do that without investing too much effort into this relationship, and before he responded - I knew in my head where my line in the sand was drawn - ABSOLUTELY no pictures or even facetime with him. To be honest, I didn’t really want to move off the app because I didn’t want to give him that much information - even my WhatsApp - about myself. So I agreed to the terms he set and I started asking him questions. He told me he lived in Texas, worked in the jewelry business, and because of that he travels all the time to Europe and that prevents him from having a real relationship with someone. I told him, oh I love jewelry but I only wear real gold….he liked my response and immediately stared calling me baby. Then, every day after that he would DM “baby how are you today?” “Baby what are you doing today?” and if I would forget to respond to him “Baby, are you ok?”. He came in fast with creating that emotional neediness and wanting attention. So I would usually make up something that I was doing - honestly you guys I talked about the weather 90% of the time. Now how often do I tell you guys NOT to talk about the weather because it’s the most basic form of conversation, it’s so surface level you learn nothing about the other person. But Richard didn’t care. He wanted the attention and my responses didn’t mean anything more than I was there engaging with him.
This went on for a couple of weeks - and at that time I created new things to talk about just to see where the conversation went. Oh I forgot to tell you guys, at the beginning after we agreed to the “terms of the relationship” he told me that he didn’t want to pay me right away and that I would have to earn his trust because he’d “been burned my other babies before who stole all of his money” and then he sent me a screenshot of a WhatsApp conversation where someone didn’t believe him, he venomed $2,000 to them and then she said Oh daddy thank you you really did it and then “never spoke to him again” So because of his past, I had to earn his trust to earn my allowance. Honestly, I thought it was strange that he was sharing all of that because I didn’t even ask but I went along with it because I was like well that will be easy to just check in daily without actually giving up anything. And it was - like I said we DMed for weeks about the weather, about the random emotions I was feeling that day, about the storms that were happening….I told him I lived in Chicago - but that wouldn’t have been hard for him to figure out seeing how my IG has that all over it so I really didn’t feel like I was exposing any additional information that wasn’t already out on the internet. Fast forward a couple more weeks and I was getting bored with this relationship but I was committed to learning about how this whole money exchange works so I made up a story and told him something that I accomplished and that I was only sharing it with him to make him feel special and as if he was a part of my life. He said congratulations and that he wanted to celebrate and that I had “deserved some gifts. I had earned his trust and that he wanted to go shopping for my gift.” He told me he was spending the weekend shopping for my gift. Pleased with the response I went about my day and did my thing. The next morning, I wake up to a DM from him saying “Baby, I need your full name and address” Clearly I knew I needed to give him a destination to send me my gift but I was like ehhh not gonna give you my home address, I literally don’t even know who you are and yet I’m supposed to just send you personal information. So we went back and forth a bit about how I wasn’t comfortable sharing that information yet and then we moved the conversation to instead of a gift, he would give me an allowance. So I said, ok Venmo me in private. This is where the train started to go off tracks. He told me “he couldn't use those services or apps because his bank account doesn’t work with them because, “I told you, other babies have stolen from me” so that instead he was going to add me to his checking account and wire me money directly into my account. Having dated a man who worked in banking before retirement planning, I was like ok you want to talk about banking services, let’s play. His explanation didn’t make sense at all and I was like hold up “Daddy, what do you mean? How does that work?” so that I could again get him to explain his thinking. “It’s very simple, just give me your full name, your bank, your routing number, and then your account number, and I’ll have my accountant add you to my bank account and you can write a check to yourself.” You guys, this is NOT how the system works but I didn’t tell him that. Instead, I played along and kept asking questions “Wait, Daddy, I’m confused, so I give you my information, and your accountant will add me to your bank account and then I write myself checks for whatever amount?” “Yes, baby that’s how it works”. “Hmm Daddy, I don’t know about this stuff, how do I get the money” “You just write yourself a check and then deposit it.” “But where do I get the checks from?” “Me, my accountant will add you to my checking account and then you write your check.” Because he played the “I don’t trust you, you have to earn my trust card” earlier in the “relationship” I played that back on him in this moment. I said, “I don’t know daddy, I don’t know if I trust you with that.” “I don’t know if I feel comfortable giving you all that information.” and he quickly replied “Baby you can trust me. Come on. It’s ok. You can trust me.” We played this game back and forth for 3 days. He kept encouraging me to give up my information and I just stopped responding after day 2. I kept telling him that I didn’t trust him and that I wasn’t sure about this..and I would ask him over and over - just pay me through Venmo. Just pay me through PayPal. Why can’t you just use a payment app?” and he would give me the same response each time “ my accountant took those off my phone” “My bank account doesn’t work with them” “I don’t have those….” all just excuses to get what he wanted from me instead of giving me what he “promised” and by the third day of this I just stopped responding. I let him marinade a couple more days before going back into the thread because I was just annoyed at this point. As fate would have it - because I don’t believe in coincidences or irony, I believe that everything happens for a reason - I started listening to the true-crime podcast - Fool Me Twice written and produced by Jules and Zara Hanaford where they discuss an online romance scam that happened to Jules. Well, I happened to be listening to the episode where they interview expert psychologists and FBI agents as they discuss the psychology behind these scammers and what they go after and how they do it. Can you guys see where this is going…..Yes. As I was listening to this episode Daddy Richard was running through my mind as an OH MY GOSH moment and then I heard it. “Online romance scammers will try multiple strategies to build trust with you upfront and then swindle you out of your money later on. They will use techniques like talking about how they themself have been scammed out of money and that they are looking for good people who won’t do that to them” and that’s when it clicked for me. Daddy Richard told me at the beginning of the online relationship that he’d be scammed out of money before and that he was looking for a good person who wasn’t going to do that to him and then later asked me for my full name, my bank, my routing and account number….I was literally engaging with an online romance scammer thinking I was engaging with a sugar daddy. Was I entirely all that surprised, no. It’s the internet you can’t trust anyone on there but was I creeped out - YES. It’s never fun to know you’ve been talking to someone completely different than who you thought it was, being the victim of a scam is a betrayal and it’s unnerving that someone could do that to another person but I knew I was playing with fire when I engaged with him. Again, I thought I knew what I was doing because I understood what I was getting into but I came close to becoming my own victim in this situation. I knew I wasn’t going to give out any personal information but I didn’t realize that I was as close to being scammed as I was until I listened to Fool Me Twice and learned about the strategies online romance scammers use to get money from their victims. If it wasn’t for Jules Hannaford’s story, I wouldn’t have realized I was engaging with a scammer. So naturally, as soon as these dots clicked in my head, I went back to the DM thread and by no surprise, it was gone. He had deleted his profile and our entire conversion thread was gone. Regrettably, I wish I’d taken more screenshots of our conversation especially because this was for a personal investigation, I should have known better to document more of the evidence, but I’ll post the screenshots I have on our show notes to show you guys how we communicated. It was as if it was a real relationship - I’m familiar with psychological games thanks to one of my exes so I’m experienced in recognizing them when they are at play (i told you guys that in the last episode when the guy was angling for a weakness) and that exact experience is what told me not to give out my personal information to this stranger online. It just didn’t seem right and THAT is the most important piece of information from this whole story - FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCT and TRUST YOUR GUT. you have to be your own protector in life and you need to have a good compass of who’s trustworthy and who’s not. We all make mistakes and sometimes the mistakes are the painful lessons we need to learn more about the duality in the world (good and bad) but that’s also what grows our intuition and we have to honor yourself by listening to it.
I thought I was walking into a normal sugar baby relationship with this stranger online (lolol as “normal” as that sentence could sound) but I was actually engaging with an online romance scam without even knowing it.
You guys - I ABSOLUTELY do NOT recommend repeating my actions here. I thought I could handle this because I knew what I was going in for and with my high social intelligence and deep understanding psychological games that are used to prey upon victims, I felt confident that I could see through the games and play along when I needed to….but even I came close to becoming a victim of an online romance scam…. Fool Me Twice talks about victims of online romance scams come from all walks of life - you can be highly educated or not educated at all, it doesn’t matter who you are everyone can fall victim to a scam and it’s imperative to educate yourself on these techniques so that you don’t accidentally walk into a situation that will hurt you physically emotionally or psychologically and even more important to NEVER NEVER NEVER give your personal information, including your banking information to anyone online.
Looking back on it - I probably could have caught this scammer earlier in the process had I been more familiar with scamming strategies - for example, I had to earn his trust because he’d be burned before, he didn’t use normal payment systems, he kept changing his reasons of why he couldn’t use the payment apps...Do I regret this - no. I knew what I was getting into when I first engaged with him and I feel more empowered now learning about this first hand to truly understand what happens in an online romance scam. Do I encourage you to go out and try this yourself - ABSOLUTELY NOT, please DO NOT do this yourself. I did this solely for research purpose and I almost got caught up in it. I’m fortunate to have had the Fool Me Twice podcast to teach me about this while I was experiencing it to recognize I was in a scam situation. Not everyone will be as lucky as I was so please don’t engage in these types of arrangements.
Scams can happen to anyone and especially now that so many people are isolated during quarantine, are you surprised to hear that scams have been on the rise?
Curves & Kisses
Curve - Predators that prey upon the emotions of others while manipulating the circumstances to keep the victims engaged in the abuse. If you haven’t watched the Jeffery Epstein documentary on Netflix titled - Filthy Rich, then you must catch it the next chance you get. This is a perfect example of a person with power and wealth taking advantage of situations and manipulating people into doing things they don’t want to because of a promised reward. These types of people are out there and they will scam you in any way possible with no remorse. Some people go for money, some people go for sex, some people combine it all and this brings me to the human rights issue that’s happening to MANY Instagram influencers & Arab Sheikhs - If you’re unfamiliar with that topic - google it. Basically these wealthy Arab Sheiks invite influencers on to their yachts with the promise of a financial payout and an amazing time on a yacht - so clearly playing to their interest of being able to post while on this massive yacht but while they are there, they are drugged, trafficked and literally held hostage until they “earn their freedom”. Their passports are immediately taken once the girls get on the boats and what these girls have to do to get out is unreal. It’s basically a legal sex ring because for some reason in 3 parts of the world human trafficking is legal - it’s so fucked up. So whether you have a lot of money like these influencers or you are unsure how you’re going to make your ends meet this month, everyone EVERYONE everyone can fall victim to a predator and especially those who are preying upon your emotions with online romance scams.
People with power and money will use it over other people just because they can. That’s what Jeffery Epstein did, that’s what all the disgusting human beings he associated with did, and that’s what people are doing online now as they prey upon your emotions and victimize you through loneliness in this quarantine.
Kiss - I’m super excited to share some news with you guys -I told you guys I was working on some exciting new things to share and in preparation of next week’s episode, I will be talking with a survivor of an online dating scam and how she turned her horrible situation into something she could share with the world and now has a webby nominated, top 10 true-crime podcast. We’ve all heard the saying When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade, well she is currently shopping around her podcast with streaming services like Netflix, HBO, Hulu and more I would say after binging her show in literally one day, it’s easy to see how any streaming service would want to produce this and it’s incredible that she got out of this situation alive and relatively unharmed.
Stay tuned for next week’s episode where I interview Jules Hannaford the survivor of an online romance scam and the main character in the true-crime podcast - Fool Me Twice.
As part of your homework - check out her show before next week’s episode and if you have any questions you’d like me to ask her, send them to me - DM our Instagram or email me at datinghotline@andswiperight.com because I have my own questions for her but I would love to include some listener questions too.
Check out her show - Fool Me Twice on all major streaming platforms - I’ll link to it in our show notes. There are 9 episodes in the narrative true crime show and it’s so full of informative information about what happened to Jules and other scammers who are out there ready to separate you from your money with just a little bit of sweet talk. Like that sugar daddy tried to do with me, I just so happened to be listening to the show at the same time as doing this research and I was stunned to hear some of the exact same lines pulled on me as I was hearing in her show... ABSOLUTELY YES go listen to it. It’s worth your time!
Ok, that’s our show for this week - thank you for tuning in to Dating Hotline - presented by AND, SWIPE RIGHT - an online dating & relationship consultancy. This is your host Chloé Miller. Thank you to our music composer Andrew Langdon for our show music and to Nikolas Thorpe for composing our transition music. If there's something you want to talk about in the future episodes, there's a link in the show notes where you can submit your stories. Otherwise, you guys, DM me your dating questions, email me your thoughts, and please, please, please tell all of your friends to listen. Don’t forget to leave us a review - we want 5 stars! Dating Hotline releases new episodes every Wednesday at 11 am CENTRAL. Please subscribe and leave us a review on Apple Podcast and follow us on Spotify.
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